Party Invitations: The Do’s the Don’t and the What Nows?!

As my kids get older, they seem to have more say in what they want – surprise surprise!

Emily’s first birthday was – let’s be honest – really for our grown-up friends. We had a cheeky drink of Prosecco, a family friend took arty photos to capture the morning and we indulged in a high sugar sponge cake with lemon curd. It was great.

Fast forward another 3 years and I spent the entire party stopping kids from painting my rental property walls with face paint and icing, and squashing cheetos into my material lounge.

It got me to thinking – what happens next year when she goes to school? Will she even have any friends to invite? My insecurities passed onto her obviously. Will she ask, or will I feel obliged to invite the entire classroom and after school activity group?

Children’s party etiquette seems to suggest that (obviously) I don’t have to feel obligated to invite an entire classroom. Phew. And that some schools even have policies about this kind of thing – like inviting half the class or less.

“If you’re not inviting everyone, it’s worth talking to your kid about discretion”, suggests one site, “and remind her that she should keep party talk to herself. And, if you’re planning to invite nearly the whole class, then you should invite everyone.”

Then there’s the invitations themselves. Call me old fashioned but I remember the paper invites inviting me to Pizza Hut to celebrate Paul’s birthday party. It was like receiving my own grown-up mail in the post. The kids can be involved in the process too: chosing the invite, decorating them.

But in a digital age – isn’t it far easier to use Facebook Events or Whatsapp where you can see when people have received your invite and keep track of responses? Is it time we “moved on”?


I’dlove to hear your opinion on invitations, do and don’ts and who to invite. What experience have you had:  good, bad or ugly?


Author Deborah, is mum of two – Emily 4 and Jack 2. Living away from family – but not friends, and wracked by mum-guilt on a day to day basis. Loves getting creative with the kids, but doesn’t like the mess it creates. #saynotoglitter

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